About Me

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I love a lot. I wait a lot. I try to find a lot to laugh at. I don't usually have trouble with that. I pray a lot. I'm not always sure who or what I pray to, but I firmly believe that prayer makes a difference. I try not to panic very often. I try to learn something new every day. I spend a lot of time poking my nose into other peoples' bidness via their blogs. I clean up an awful lot of feathers. You can dress me up, but you can't really take me out. I travel a lot when I can find bird sitters and we take them with us when I can't. I drink, prolly to excess, but I rarely get sick because my body is a hostile environment to germs (or maybe no SELF RESPECTING germ would LIVE in my body?) I collect: gnomes, passport stamps, MONEY-preferably US dollars or Euros, red headed womyn and chicks named Stephanie. My Momma taught me many many years ago that girls don't fart, they foosie. She taught me lots of other chit too. Thanks for stopping by-leave me a comment and let me know you were here, feel free to link to me, or email me at jacquelynn.fortner@gmail.com

Monday, December 15, 2008

Take that, Monday

I had to take El Juevo to school this morning for his exams, so I was in a rush, and frankly, I just wasn't feeling it.  I think this is the first time in about a month and a half where I didn't wake up with something "on my fingers".  Sorry, but that's how it works for me, folks.  Either it's there or it isn't.  

I think part of it is because of how squirrelly I've been feeling.  When I am not on my game, everyone knows it-I pretty much wear my heart on my sleeve.  What really bothers me the most, though, is that because I had a partial hysterectomy twenty one years ago (MY GOD-THAT IS A WHOLE ADULT AGO!) I never know if I am bitchy because I'm hormonal because I'm supposed to be on my period, bitchy because I'm hormonal because I'm going through menopause, or if I'm just bitchy because I'm a fucking bitch.  Take your pick. 

When I was checking my email before I got on the road, I ran into this article, and decided that I needed some of that there therapy, but I was hesitant to inflict myself on anyone, so I flew solo.  I hit the mall in Biloxi while Egg was in school, then dropped him off at home and ran to the mall in Mobile.  I got a few things accomplished that I couldn't do with Dar with me.  (Well, duh!?!  I had to shop for her sometime!)

I won't say I'm cured, but I'm on the mend.  I had a nice long visit with some shoes that I've been bonding with, and managed to get almost all of the rest of my Christmas shopping done.  I finger I have about one and a half to two more days worth of running around, and then the baking will commence.  If you have any orders, you'd better get them in quick-there are a limited number of carrots in the greater Pascagoula area!

Now I am off for a different kind of therapy.  I am going to have a big girl beverage and catch up on my reader as I have no idea what ya'll have been up to today, and will have a whole new attitude when I get up tomorrow.  Right?


Improbable Joe said...

Oooohhhh... have a drink for me, since I'm off the beers for the next year or so!

julz said...

Bitchy is a HIGHLY subjective term.We is what we is WHEN we is, and the folks still there when the storm is past are the ones we build lives on/with.
Buy the shoes. Send pics. Love you

NurseExec said...

dayum, girl, you were allllll up and down the gulf coast today, LOL! Enjoy your grown up beverage and your 'puter, 'puter, 'puter, 'puter, 'puter! *snickering*

Mariah said...

Enjoy your big girl beverage.. Does the hangover cure realy work?

Braja said...

Wow, Biloxi is really a place? (hehe...) And I KNEW IT!! Manolos can save your LIFE, Derfina...LIFE. You go girl. You know what you gotta do. Liberate all those poor little cows who were used to make shoes, take them home, CARE for them!!

Then have a drink on me.

Braja said...

OMG Derfina you gotta see this:


I typed in And So This Is Xmas, and rolled around laughing at their response. Type in several, and include some made up ones...so funny

derfina said...

Improbable Joe-Consider it done!

Julz-I'm all about the sometimes being a bitch is all a girl has to hold onto thing. It's part of my charm. Come to our New Years Party and you can see the shoes in person. Love you, too. *smooches*

NurseExec-Have credit cards, will travel! And again-consider it done!

Mariah-The only hangover cure I know of that works is sobriety. Meh.

Braja-They ARE already gone from this life, so we might as well get some use out of their 'remains', eh? I LOVE the link! Especially the "We don't know that one...We're just little kids" ones!

Kelley said...


I am sure that you said other stuff but I was blinded by the word.


I think I just... you don't wanna know ;)

darsden said...

I don't think you are a B***h at all... I think it is the people you hang around with (they are the ones ya have to deal with)...LOL *smirky*

Braja said...

I think both you bitches and i say that in a nice way should go over to Irish's site and read this:


I'm shouting her out later but you're going to wet yourselves laughing at this woman. don't go there with hopes of Santa's lovin' vibes embracing you...don't...just don't....now go, and laugh....