About Me

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I love a lot. I wait a lot. I try to find a lot to laugh at. I don't usually have trouble with that. I pray a lot. I'm not always sure who or what I pray to, but I firmly believe that prayer makes a difference. I try not to panic very often. I try to learn something new every day. I spend a lot of time poking my nose into other peoples' bidness via their blogs. I clean up an awful lot of feathers. You can dress me up, but you can't really take me out. I travel a lot when I can find bird sitters and we take them with us when I can't. I drink, prolly to excess, but I rarely get sick because my body is a hostile environment to germs (or maybe no SELF RESPECTING germ would LIVE in my body?) I collect: gnomes, passport stamps, MONEY-preferably US dollars or Euros, red headed womyn and chicks named Stephanie. My Momma taught me many many years ago that girls don't fart, they foosie. She taught me lots of other chit too. Thanks for stopping by-leave me a comment and let me know you were here, feel free to link to me, or email me at jacquelynn.fortner@gmail.com

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Aftermath and looking ahead


We got up later than usual this morning.  The birds let us sleep until nine, which is unheard of. (Maybe what was unheard was the birds?)  We got up and took care of them, me downing two full bottles of icy water in the process, which could have been disastrous, but I managed to keep it down.  I knew at that point that there was no way in hell I could look a cup of coffee in the face so I set my hambone on the stove to simmer and told the Innocent Bystander I needed to go lay down.  As he was already laid out on the couch watching football warmup shows, there were no objections, so I went back to bed and slept until one.  Now I feel much mo' betterer, but you'd never guess it by looking at me.  Word to the wise?  Ham?  And beer?  *shakes head* Even with my diuretics my eyes look like two peeholes in the snow and my fingers feel like so many of those little sausages in barbecue sauce dipped in ranch dressing that I carelessly but lovingly let slide down my well lubricated maw.  I might as well have eaten a salt sandwich. With a side of salt.


So.  What am I throwing out with the bathwater that was 2008?

Well, hopefully some of those little sausages.  This holiday season has been very...shall we say caloric?  There are some very padded parts is parts that need to have some of the people worked off of them.  I need to stop spending so much time in front of this computer and more time outside where all the life in this river is.  If I can't commit to exercising, I can at least commit to trying to exercise a little self control.  The IB has many irresistible meal requests that I am going to have to make whilst he is home, and I need to do some forking resisting.  Get it?  Forking?  Eh...I know.  Lame.  Blame it on midnight.  Shame on the moon.

Something else I'm going to try to let go of is my obsessiveness about this blog.  I am no longer going to try to make myself write something every day, at least not for publication.  I was surprised and a little bit saddened last week (not for long-the IB has a way of taking my mind off all things sad, don'tcha know?) when I realized that on that day and a half I took off, my technorati rating went up more than it had the entire previous week.  This is not a job, and I'm certainly not making any money at it-I've been at it for nearly four months and am not even halfway to that magical point that will generate a check, so I need to give myself permission to take a day or two off every week to stop and smell the roses.  

And finally, the news.  I am officially saying a fond farewell to fartwater!  2008 was a year of much progress around here, all thanks to the IB.  We gained a much improved road and bridge last year, as well as a well, but well, that well? *shakes head* Not so well.  Really bad smell.  So the IB took pity on us and yesterday, had installed a most sophisticated water purification system that renders fartwater supposedly of drinking quality, although I am a bit skeptical on that one.  I will give it this-the odor is G.O.N.E.  And when I add detergent to my washer, it doesn't look like I am pouring in orange koolaide powder.  We are still running chlorine through the pipes and such to clean them out, but I can tell that the system is doing what it is supposed to, so I will at least be able to shower in my own home rather than having to go a half mile up the road.  And if I do decide I want a bath rather than a shower?  He also had the same system installed on the house!  Now we have city quality water in not one, but BOTH places!

The upshot is that 2009 has gotten off to a rip roaring start here in paradise.  Bright and shiny and full of possibilities and opportunities.  I will do my best to not waste a single one of them!

Lagniappe:

14 comments:

darsden said...

WhewHewww nomore fartwater.. I need that for out here. Maybe pop will take pity upon the mole hole dweller. Yes, I agree you need to get more fresh air & go for more boat rides (with "bodyexisting"friends)

Anonymous said...

I seem to have put on a little extra padding thru the holidays too. Sigh ... Oh well - new year, new start. I'm glad you've got some improvements to your water!

Mama Dawg said...

Happy New Year and here's to no more fartwater!

I'm in NOLA for the holidays and having a blast.

Vodka Mom said...

Happy new year! Thank GOD there will be no more fartwater.

Improbable Joe said...

Clean, non-stinky water is a good thing... not good enough that I don't water my lawn with the smelly stuff, you know? I've got clean water INSIDE, and that's all that matters.

Lisa G said...

Here's to no more fartwater!! Yayyy, for the IB.

derfina said...

Dar-did you get my text about boys night out which = girls night out? I'm thinking Wii golf?

Twenty Four-Here's to new starts. I can start by getting my bike out instead of driving the half mile to the house. (don't hold your breath)

Mama Dawg-No fair! I am jealous.

Vodka Mom-Yes. God, and two thousand bucks.

Improbable Joe-It is a VERY good thing.

NurseExec-yes, yay to the IB. Once again, folks, my husband is NOT a douchebag.

*smooches* to all!

♥ Braja said...

I'm also gonna pull back on the blogging and wander around more ... we could do virtual walks together, Derfina :)

Anonymous said...

Amen to no fartwater! And that picture of salt would have made me pee my pants except I am retaining so much water....

Pseudo said...

Ah, the balance of life and writing about life.

So glad about your water getting defarted.

Happy 2009!

Unknown said...

I had to partake of the diuretics today. Puffy does not even begin to describe me today. hehehe

Good luck with that self control thing. ;)

Anonymous said...

I'm with you on the blog obsession thing. One thing I'm doing is clearing out the blogs from my reader. I subscribe to so many, and seeing that ominous double (and sometimes triple) digit number of unread posts is daunting, especially now that things are getting busy again.

Live first. Blog when you can . . .

Rassles said...

It's hard to take time away from blogging, because you feel guilty for ignoring people that you don't intend to ignore. Tough balance, you know?

♥ Braja said...

I just had to come back and double check that photo of you was real :)) Where you, girl?