About Me

My photo
I love a lot. I wait a lot. I try to find a lot to laugh at. I don't usually have trouble with that. I pray a lot. I'm not always sure who or what I pray to, but I firmly believe that prayer makes a difference. I try not to panic very often. I try to learn something new every day. I spend a lot of time poking my nose into other peoples' bidness via their blogs. I clean up an awful lot of feathers. You can dress me up, but you can't really take me out. I travel a lot when I can find bird sitters and we take them with us when I can't. I drink, prolly to excess, but I rarely get sick because my body is a hostile environment to germs (or maybe no SELF RESPECTING germ would LIVE in my body?) I collect: gnomes, passport stamps, MONEY-preferably US dollars or Euros, red headed womyn and chicks named Stephanie. My Momma taught me many many years ago that girls don't fart, they foosie. She taught me lots of other chit too. Thanks for stopping by-leave me a comment and let me know you were here, feel free to link to me, or email me at jacquelynn.fortner@gmail.com

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Things that make me go...WTF?

I'm prolly going to take some flack for this, but I have to get this out.  I have some burning questions.

As you may have suspected, I don't have too many issues about sexuality.  *snort*  Is that the understatement of the century or WHAT?  Who you choose to play put tab A into slot B with is your business and yours alone.  I have friends who are gay, both male and female.  I have had friends in the past who prolly stretch the boundaries between what is shall we say "socially acceptable" in the bedroom and what is not.  So please don't misunderstand this as an effort to point and laugh at anyone.

There is a couple who lives close to here, and yes, I know for a fact that they are significant others (which is relevant here), not just roomies.  For the first two years we lived in the houseboat, we'd pass them every time we drove down the road.  It looked to me like a rather homely woman and the guy who played Riff Raff in Rocky Horror Picture Show.  When the woman was outside, she was usually working on cars, as she is kind of a local shade tree mechanic, and she has a tendency to wear bikinis when she is working on them during the summer as it gets so hot down here it's like walking in someone else's sweat.  Not a bad body, but again, she's not going to be wearing any Miss Orange Grove sashes around either.  I think of them now as Thing One (Riff Raff) and Thing Two (the 'woman'). 

Around a year and a half ago, we found out that they were not actually born as a man and a woman, they were both born male.  (And this is all just the local gossip-I am NOT violating my former HIPAA obligations for any of my bitches who may be reading.)  And that they are both undergoing sex change operations.  Supposedly Thing One (!!!) has already had the operation but Thing Two has not. Incidentally, I also discovered on my own that at least one of them has a rubber fetish.  I won't tell you how I know that.  *coughgooglestalkercough*

My questions are these:

What ARE they and what are they trying to accomplish?  I can't say that they are gay, as evidently they both feel that they are men trapped in women's bodies, but did they used to be back before Thing One got his willy whacked off?  Are they right now hetero as they are a male female couple right now?  What about when the other one has the operation?  Maybe that's it.  They're trying to let out their inner lesbians.  After last night, who knows...I may have to nuzzle into those breastesses one more time to finger out whether myne needs let out for some air!  I mean, there are definitely some womyn out there who make me want to grow a dick of myne own.  So what does that make me? And what about Naomi?

This is a problem.  I mean, I'm not knocking them.  Thing One seems to be of at least average intelligence the few times I've talked to  _______(and here's my problem-do I say HIM or HER here?  Or IT?  Insert your choice.) and evey time I see Thing Two I want to borrow ______(his/her/its) shoes and give _______(you know the drill by now-if not, your helmet will be issued at the door on your way out) hair and beauty advice.  With Thing One, it is really difficult, as it is rather hard to think of someone who looks like Riff Raff as being a her, even though she supposedly is. And with Thing Two she is a he.  Can we just change our sexuality like we do our panties?  I'm so confused.  


Dana said...

WTF? Yeah, I am confused too. To each his/her/it's own I suppose.

Pearl said...

I am no expert on gender, but the only advice I have here is to call whoever by the sex they prefer. I mean, if they're trying to be/look female, I'd call them "her".

As for the rest of it, it's a good thing that it's such a big country.



Speaking of blurred lines and whatnot, my word verification is "hamato". :-) I think I would like a hamato, on toast, with a thin slice of onion and some salt and pepper.

Di said...

A male living as female (crosser dresser), a male who's had an operation or one who's waiting on an operation or one who was born male and is now a female pre-op or will not take the final step or any form of that is always a HER.

They are both SHE'S since they are living as and are going through the transformation to become a woman.

And if it's the opposite it's a HIM. It's common courtesy, call they as they wish to be. Men in drag, when in drag, also want to be addressed as girl, she, her etc.

It's very common here and some of my friends I address as "girl" and say "she" when talking about them.

derfina said...

dana-*nods* And they seem to be happy together as they've been together forevah.

pearl-that's my feeling too. It's just kinda hard to wrap my mind around because the one GIRL makes NO effort to look at all feminine 90% of the time. The other 10% she carries a purse, but that is it, as far as I can tell. And thanks for the new food to crave-hamato! Sounds like it'd be good on a bagel. Oh-and thanks for the Chinese food last night that I talked the IB into thanks to your post about your creative birthday card!

di-thanks. that spells it out logically. And again, it might be easier to think of the one as a girl if I could see that she'd put in some effort to look the part. And it is very uncommon around here in the tiny community we live in, so there is really no one to bounce this off of. I appreciate the input.


SgtSudsWife said...

Hmmm that is a confusing situation.I don't really know.I guess call them whatever it is they are trying to be but do we even know what THAT is?

derfina said...

sgt-it IS hard to tell, especially since this is all based on rumor and speculation anyway. Who knows. I may just be the girl that goes straight to the source and just ask them!

Di said...

lol- I know girls who were BORN girls who are still TRYING to be girls and they don't put effort into looking hte part. That's when it gets tricky hahaha.

derfina said...

di-Ironically, most of the time (unless I am working fill in at the clinic which is rare) that girl is ME. Makes ya wonder, eh? (Perhaps this explains why I am such a (as the Unit calls me) dyke magnet.